11 Days

There are only 11 days left for me and Texas to be together. It is amazing to me that I have made it through a year down here and that it is time to move on to the next adventure/chapter of my life. As this last week of normal classes started we all looked around for a moment and just took it all in. Looking around, trying to remember each detail of everything we see so that we never forget. However, the harsh reality will hit at some point – within five to ten years from now we won’t remember a lot of this. One girl has been counting her steps from building to building so that she will always know how long it takes to walk from place to place. It’s a nice thought but honestly, in ten years will she truly care how many steps it took to get from the dorm to the dining hall. I am not counting my steps as I go around the school grounds but normally talking with someone, thinking about what the last teacher just talked about or replaying a memory from this year over again in my head.

Last week there were many people worried about me, I was pretty checked out and just not here. On Wednesday morning between hour one of class and hour two I found out that a very dear friend, Naomi, had passed away. I had no words to tell anyone of what had happened, why I was crying uncontrollably or what they could do. My friends hugged me and I fell into their arms and felt the Hill behind as my mine went back in time. By Wednesday night I was emotional checked out, and had been crying most of the day. Thursday night there was a horrible storm - we were on tornado watch and the ground would shake with thunder. After little sleep the night before and then the storm keeping me up that night I was physical drained on Friday. And mentally I just wasn’t there – I was reliving something Naomi and I had done, replaying memories of her over again in my head. On Saturday I watched her memorial service online and after listening to what her family had to stay about her and how she lived her life to the fullest I realized she wouldn’t have wanted me to fall apart forever over her passing.

I just looked at myself and how I was the few days before and realized how silly this all was. I still have two weeks here and I am living like I am not here because someone that I love is gone to heaven a place I have learned more about this year and long to go to. I am allowed to be sad about her passing and even shed a tear or two. But even more so I should be joyful of her passing and look upon her life as an example of how I should be living my life to the fullest each day. I just have to close my eyes to see Naomi again and I will hold close to the fact that one day I will see her again. I just have to close my eyes and go back in time to the classes I’ve taken here and the crazy things I’ve done here too. I am allowed to be sad about leaving but not to the point where life as I know it stops because life doesn’t stop, you just stop living it. Texas and I will always be together in my heart even if I am not actually still down here and Naomi, she will always be in heart.

Love,

a.m.

Another Count Down

It might look like from the outside that our life here at the Hill is full of only count downs for something else great to happen. Well on one hand it kind of is but on the other there are so many grand adventures we go on every day that we just can’t really count down for cause we don’t normally know until after it’s over how much fun we truly had. I have learned that most of the time the adventures that I don’t feel like going on are the ones that are the most fun. However, I don’t always remember that and miss out on some great fun says some. There is no way to know what each day will hold until it’s over and you’re looking back on it – normally being amazed of what happened.

That’s really like life overall though because truly who knows where their life is leading until they look back and see everything they have come through. I sure don’t know where my life is leading. One day I am ready to pack my bags and move to some small island somewhere in the middle of an ocean, and then next day I am sure I am meant to go to Colorado and do the second year program for Torchbearers and some mornings I get up and just want to be in University all ready. For being a person that tends to have a plan for the next five years I am pretty lost at the moment. Though I do have a plan I just don’t know if it will play out the way I want it to since I have so many other ideas and thoughts of fun things to do. I can plan all I want but it might never come to pass as I want or have it planned out to be. Most things don’t happen the way I plan them so why would I be surprised about my life not turning out the way I want it too.

Love,

a.m

ps - HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE COOLEST BROTHER EVER!!

 

Nine Months

Nothing has gone by faster than the past nine months have. At the end of each week I would look at my roomies and ask them what I did all week. They are normally able to list everything since I am with them a lot of the time. People tend to say that life just speeds up the older you get but I can’t imagine it going by any faster than it already is and I’m only 19 years old. I can look back upon the last nine months and remember so many great things – so many memories from inside the door, in class, playing boarding games, counting down the minutes until work day is over and trying to make the most of my time while at outreach each week. Plus so many more.

While talking to other His Hill students that have come back to visit I can understand why they all say this was the best year ever. First reason is always because it’s in Texas and everything is better and bigger in Texas. Then because we get five hours of Bible teaching five days week from some pretty interesting people. Also since we are meeting people from all over the world that all want to be your friend and are excited to be able to be this journey with you. The reasons could truly go on forever about why this year is so awesome. But mainly for me just because it’s something new.  A change, a new adventure.

Love,

a.m

Sebastian

My room got another pet a while ago. However, with this one there is absolutely no up keep. He dances, he sleeps at the end of mine and Noelle’s beds and he works really nicely as a backrest. What is this pet you might ask yourself. Well, let me fill you in our the happenings of Left Side Down #3 –

A few weeks ago when it was my work day duty to clean the boys dorms, I saw Sebastian in one of the rooms but he was much too high for me to reach him so I just pondered the idea for the rest of the week of how I might be able to get him down without having to move anything or ask for help the next week. The next Thursday he was no longer there. I had a moment of silent as my dream has just disappeared and then got back to work of cleaning. A little while later in a different room I found my new friend and he was in arms reach. I talked to Adri my cleaning buddy for a moment about what was about to happen. As was going to have to run across half of campus with him and well he isn’t the smallest of animals. She agreed to cover for me any one asked where I went and then I was off and running - across the field, past the fish house, the swings and through the parking lot into the girls dorm.

As I pasted the fish house, one of the boys saw me and began to shout out to me about how I was stealing his pet since it was firstly in his room before everyone decided they wanted to have him too. But now he is in the girl’s dorm very unlikely he will be leaving any time before the end of the year since the boys are rarely in here. We have to invite them in and that doesn’t happen very often.

Still wondering what our new pet is, well the time has come. He’s a tiger. Sebastian, the tiger. The boys have a different name for him but I can never remember it so we had to change it to something else. He is much easier to take of than any of our fish were, but not always as much fun since he isn’t actually a real animal.

Love,

a.m

Last Weekend Memories

Way back at the beginning of the semester a bunch of us brought tickets to go to a Spurs game. Then a little while later all us girls decided to start planning the boy’s appreciation night and all of this fell on Easter weekend. By far the busiest weekend all year. With all that some of our teachers put a lot of homework due for this past week and this coming week. Free time is something not very common around here lately.

Even though it has been super busy for most of us, it has also been the funniest weekend this semester by far. We went from one activity to the next one and most of the time running around trying to make the boys wonder what they will be doing.

On Friday night most of the student body got onto the Cool Bus and we went into San Antonio to the AT&T Center for a Spurs vs. Clippers game. It was such a blast! I have never really been into basketball but some of my really good friends here are in love with it so I have learned lots this year about it and also learned I am not going to ever play because I am not good at all. But that’s beside the point, the game was so crazy, back and forth and down to the last second it could have went either way.  In the last five minutes I made a bet with one of the boys who was cheering for the Clippers that the Spurs would win. At that point they were winning and in the end they did win. However, that was the longest five minutes of my life. All of a sudden the Clippers were winning and then the Spurs and then back to the Clippers. In like the last second of the game the Spurs got ahead and won! This means I will not be buying myself ice cream on the next ice cream run!

On Saturday most girls were going crazy making sure everything was perfect for the boy’s day. We first sent them on a little walk to find a staff member who would have more information about the first activity for them. In one of the more treed area of the grounds we had them play sling shot paint ball for like two hours. None of us girls got to go down and watch but the boys said they had a lot of fun and that was way better than anything they had imagined. For supper we went over to this ranch that was totally the way anyone would picture a small Texan ranch. It was by far one of the cutest places I have ever visited. We all ate supper together there and then played games outside, played pool in the house game room and just sat around talking together. We thought the sun would set sooner than it did because we were going to leave the boys there so that they could watch a movie outside at the ranch. However, it took a lot longer to set that day, which wasn’t bad just set up back on our time line. They were still able to watch the whole movie and get more time to hang out with us girls. Overall, I think it went over very well and the boys really enjoyed it.

On Sunday, we all had to be up, nice looking and at the chapel for sunrise service at eight am sharp. Plus, my new daily duty is cleaning one of the public bathrooms so I had to clean that before the service started because people not from the Hill were coming. One of the earliest morning yet for me. The second year students put on the service and did a wonderful job. Then everyone went over to the Fish House for breakfast together at nine. So much food and so many people I had never seen before.  I ate breakfast, took a few pictures and then went back to bed.

Most of Sunday I sleep since there wasn’t much of it the days before hand. It was a wonderful weekend! Just much busier than any of us would have thought or wanted to plan.

Love,

a.m

First Week Back

Here we are at the beginning of the last ten weeks of school at the Hill. These are the weeks we are meant to be enjoying life even more and going crazy even more and just making the very most of the time we have together as a school. As a room without really talking about it we all decided we were going to work out in these last ten weeks. Some run, have a workout have Jillian Michael’s and then three of us are all doing Insanity. If you don’t know what it is, that’s probably for the best because it is one of the most painful things ever. I don’t think I have ever sweated more in my whole life. Noelle tells me every time I tell her my caffs hurt that it is a good feeling. However, I think she is way wrong.

On Monday the two girls from my room that went home for break came back to the Hill. Noelle arriving first – middle of the afternoon as most of the girls are laying out on the back deck of the dorm enjoying the sunshine. We see the schools white van turn onto the road that leads up to the hill. With a scream and pointing finger from Heidi we all jump up and begin to run to the van’s parking place. What we didn’t think about it how hot the ground was going to be when running without shoes on. It was so hot. Both Heidi and I realized after hugging Noelle and standing and talking for a moment that we were burning the bottoms of our feet. Turning around and running back to the dorm where we soaked out feet in cold water we found out what happened to our feet. She had two blisters on the bottom and I had seven (three on one foot and four on the other). It was horribly hard to walk around the rest of the day and then the next day as well. So after talking to a few people here I came to the conclusion I needed to pop them all. Tuesday night sitting up on the bathroom counter again I stabbed a pin into my foot four times (three of the blisters weren’t hurting me so I am letting them heal on their own for now). I don’t like gross things like blood, blisters, cuts or anything along those lines on other people but on myself I am pretty fine with it. Since the next night I had to do it again to the biggest blister cause it just won’t go away.

It is so very nice to be back at the Hill with all my rooms again. Two of the girls I roomed with last semester as well so a day without seeing those two is a very sad day. Everyone here is my friend, then there are some I am closer too and then there are my roommates who are like my sisters. They wake me up in the morning, reminded me of my daily duty at lunch, tell me when something really doesn’t look good together and can tell how I am feeling better than anyone else. Without these four I would totally be lost in Texas. Last semester it was a bit harder to find time to have roommate dates or snack times and things but this semester it happens like four or five times a week just because we are always in our room hanging out. Not saying last semester we didn’t enjoy our room or that we weren’t friends but things are just different. I will surely miss these girls a lot after May 24.

love,

a.m

So Its Been A While

Hey There,

I realized throughout my whole life that I am not the type of person to keep in touch with others. I am just not good at it and tend to have the mindset if you wanna keep me then you gotta work at it. But then I thought one day - I can’t be the only person in the whole world that has thought that way. So, what I am thinking that way about one person and also thinking it'd be nice to keep them around in my life but don’t do anything and then they are thinking the same way I am. Neither of us will do anything to keep in touch with each other but we both want to. How silly is that!

And on that note I deleted Facebook. Which would firstly mean there are a whole lot of people who think I have just went a floated off into space because I didn’t say I was getting rid of it, I just did. I was there one day and gone the next, without letting anyone.

If I want to keep in touch with people shouldn’t I want to keep Facebook - one of the biggest social media websites with over 1.01 billion people using it. That would be the best way to keep in touch with people and most likely be the easiest way for me to keep in touch with people and I deleted it. What was I thinking? Was I thinking?

Well here it is - I don’t keep in touch with Facebook, I post about my life to see how many likes I can get. What is the point of that? I don’t care what people are doing unless I know they will have an interesting life then I creep them and then I am judging them or being jealous of their life. Why would I want to creep people to see their lives when I am either impressed with their life and wishing it was mine or I am not impressed with their life? It just doesn’t make sense to me.

So, that’s my life lately. Nothing overly exciting just looking at my life and seeing what I don’t want and figuring out what I should be looking to add.

Love,

a.m