Celebrating

Birthdays are normally days meant for celebrating the fact that you made it through another year. It’s the one day of the year that is completely dedicated about one person (or persons depending how many people you know with the same birthday) and making them feel special and loved. We give gifts so that they know how special they are and so that they never forget it. It’s the one day of the year that people look so forward too (or at least I know I love my birthday), some people even start the count down the day after their birthday for the next one.  

Today is a very special birthday – it’s my friend, Acacia's birthday. She would be all grown up now, an adult I guess. But sadly she didn't make it through the year. Acacia pasted away last September, barely a month after her birthday. I understand that she is in a much better place but there are so many people down here on earth that love her and miss her very much. That want to be with her to celebrate this milestone of becoming an adult but she’s not here to celebrate with them.

I am happy that she is in heaven with our heavenly father, but I am sad that she wasn’t able to finish high school with her class and she wasn’t able to go to Japan - her favorite place in the world. I’m confused because I don’t understand why she had to go so soon and I am mad that she left us without being able to go to Japan and teach English and be in her all-time favorite culture. I don’t know how I am meant to feel today - Birthdays are for celebrating and celebrating means being happy and joyful. However, I am just not in a celebrating mood at all. It’s the last thing I feel like doing today. I'd much rather just sit in the sun light and empty my busy brain from everything that is running through it.

love,
a.m.